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Rob Oller commentary: Valentine
 
02/14/2006
Love is in the air. Too bad it sometimes stinks like Pepe Le Pew.

While thousands of sweethearts romance one another with pitiful poems and lame limericks and millions more express their devotion through chocolate and longstemmed roses, there also are those today who favor friction over affection.

Athletes are not immune to such antipathy, as evidenced by Lance Armstrong’s recent breakup with Sheryl Crow. Apparently, an exhilarating bicycle ride along the Champs-Elysees wasn’t enough to save their French Connection.

Instead of crying C’est la vie, however, we’re shouting ‘That’s amore’ by offering the services of our ink-stained cupid to add some civility to some uncivil wars taking place in arenas and stadiums from Tacoma to Turin.

Time to kiss and make up:

Bode Miller and his mouth — It must be hard on any athlete whose sharp tongue makes more headlines than his talent. Miller’s mouth got him in mucho trouble the past several weeks, but his No. 1 sponsor, Nike, seemed to fan the flames of controversy rather than extinguish them. If Miller doesn’t win a medal, his career might win gold for the fastest downhill. Time for the skier and his brash statements to call a truce.

Al Michaels and Monday Night Football — This broken relationship is like the husband and wife who decide to divorce after 45 years because one wants to retire to Florida and the other to Arizona. Michaels is leaving MNF after 20 seasons to broadcast NBC’s Sunday night NFL game. For some odd reason, he wants to remain close to Jaba the John Madden. As part of the exchange, ABC gets rights to Oswald the cartoon bunny, whose comic timing won’t make anyone forget his cousin Bugs.

Wayne Gretzky and his wife, Janet "Take the Points" Jones — Imagine the conversations that have gone on in the Great One’s home in the wake of the NHL gambling scandal involving Jones and Rick Tocchet, who is Gretzky’s friend and assistant coach in Phoenix.

Wayne: "Honey, why did

www.dispatch.com/sports-story.php?story=dispatch/2006/02/14/20060214-E1-03.html



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